Julie

Now imagine the above title

Delivered in the immaculate,

Dulcet and-ever-so-slightly-Welsh tones

Of actor Anthony Hopkins.

Actually, you can do better than imagine:

Watch the very much-underrated film

‘Meet Joe Black’

And near the end you will hear this line

Spoken to Brad Pitt’s character

[Joe Black, who is, in fact, Death himself –

It is a remake of ‘Death Takes a Holiday’].

“Well, what can I tell you?”

Just that

[with age – a lot of it!]

I’m becoming more sensitive to Life.

I noticed [well my wife did first]

That our dog, Julie, runs out

If ever I go to pick up the fly-swat

Even when she is not in the same room.

[And no, before you put 2+2 together

And make seventeen,

No one has ever hit or even brandished

This weapon at our Berger Belge],

I’m sure she can sense moths & mites

Under threat and in fear for their lives:

She recognises Death, I’m sure.

We’ve got tons of traps

Of the sticky-paper kind.

So now I find myself having to take pity

Upon any poor ‘souls’ stuck fast,

[Do they have souls?  Do we for that matter?]

Put them out of their misery

[Rather the misery I’ve caused them]

With my ‘pousse de grâce’.

Some say they can’t sense suffering.

I don’t buy that. I’m sure Life can feal fear:

It’s a survival instinct,

And survival is the first pre-requisite of life, surely?

I’m getting nearer to not eating

Veau et agneau.

I’m not quite there yet though.

Lambs are sent to slaughter at 5 months:

They don’t even see the year round once.

In what world of four seasons is it ‘right’

They should not even see two of them?

The shepherd protects his flock from the wolves

Then delivers up his trusting sheep

To wolves in human clothing.

Thought about cutting red meat out entirely

And opting for chicken instead:

They have the lowest feed-to-food ratio after all

But they are grown then slaughtered

At five weeks, not even five months…

Life.  What can I tell you…….?